Archive for the 'Rant' Category

Somebody Call the WAAAHmbulance!

Tuesday, July 21st, 2009

I can’t really talk about the big things that are going on around here at the moment. I’m exhausted and saddened by the crap and turmoil that Parker is going through. Yesterday was a great day if you’re into drama. I’m not, so I won’t elaborate on that.

So instead, I’m going to complain about what’s going on in my own life. Can I complain for a few? Too bad, I’m going to anyway.

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RIP Billy Mays

Sunday, June 28th, 2009

Current Mood:Alarmed emoticon Alarmed

Seriously? What’s going on here? I had just finished my post about Farrah Fawcett when I heard about Michael Jackson. I was too blog-exhausted to post anything about it. But yeah… this is weird. RIP Billy. Now we’ll have to find someone else to yell at us to buy stuff.

(oh and in case you forgot, I was Billy Mays for Halloween last year)

Billy Mays!

Defending UP

Wednesday, June 24th, 2009

Current Mood:Angry emoticon Angry

This morning, a good friend of mine forwarded me an e-mail entitled “Pixar’s UP: Adorable or Deplorable?”. In the E-mail, Pixar was accused of “subtlely advancing the agenda of emasculating society” through “sins of omission” of “all fathers” as was relayed by his niece (?). Well this got to me (and yes, I’m angry about other stuff going on right now) and so I wrote a long-winded rant in defense of “UP”. I’m not going to post my friend’s e-mail out of respect of privacy, but since I spent a while crafting my response, I feel proud enough to post it here:

!!! WARNING – SPOILERS BELOW !!!

——————–

Dear *****,

I’m sad about your e-mail. I’m also confused. I can’t tell if you saw it yourself or if you’re just going off what someone else said. When I told you how much I loved UP, you were dismissive because “the characters seemed unendearing”. I remember you saying to the effect of “Andy Rooney and a Squinty-eyed little freak?”. (The kid is Asian, dude! I was shocked you would say something like that). I let that bother me for the rest of the day, because UP was a ray of sunlight during this trying time in my life.

I had a very different take on it. Yes, the Russel’s father was absent (something I can relate to too well) and he tried the to be the best scout he could to earn approval (another thing I can relate to). In the end, the deadbeat dad didn’t come through (amen), and the thing that touched me, is that the cranky old Carl took him under his wing and mentored him. He made a transition of taking the pain of his past and using his gold to bless and mentor this young boy. Then the end credits shows them doing all the things that Russel’s dad didn’t do with him – Fishing, eating ice cream, going to the movies, etc. I stayed through the credits and cried the whole time.

Disney’s track record of omitting father figures has bothered me for years. But keep in mind that this was a PIXAR movie. There’s a difference there, and I saw this as redemption for Disney’s sins of the past. Mentoring / father figures / hero worship is one of the core themes of this movie. Additionally, the mature themes of marriage, death, unrealized dreams, mourning, overcoming grief, disillusionment, surrogacy, disappointment, loneliness, old age, protection, forgiveness and passion are all very heavy prominent themes all throughout. I was in tears within the first ten minutes (and even before that if you count the short “partly cloudy”).

To me, the fact that the explorer character turned out to be the villain emphasized the disillusionment that one receives from placing a hero on a pedestal. It didn’t undermine Carl and Ellie’s dream. And it started the chain of events that caused Carl to introspect and realize that it wasn’t too late to start a new adventure – in mentoring Russell.

I saw the undoubtedly PRO-masculine message in this movie. It was far from deplorable and so much more than adorable. It held a very deep and touching message that made me feel golden for days. I gushed about it to my friends on staff at the NWTA a week later because of it’s pro-masculine and uplifting message. I can honestly say now that it’s one of my favorite movies ever.

I don’t know if your niece and I saw the same movie. I didn’t see any emasculation or “subtle agenda advancing”. UP was the best movie I’ve seen all year and hands-down the best Pixar film to date. I can’t remember the last movie I saw that affected me so deeply, especially when it comes to my own father wounds.

With the near-universal praise that Up has (rightfully) received I judge that many of those who are critical are simply being contrary for the sake of being contrary. Or perhaps they are holding Pixar films to an impossible standard, while letting other mediocre, timely, pop-culture referencing fluff like “Shrek” “Chicken Little” or “Madagascar” (Dreamworks & Disney I’m looking at you) pass for decent entertainment for our kids. That’s deplorable.

In the so-called “Summer of Sh*t” (not my words, but true), Up stands out as a freaking diamond. It would in any other year as well.

–Tyler

Seriously, Virgin Mobile?!

Friday, May 22nd, 2009

That’s just messed up, you guys.

Watchmen Overkill

Thursday, March 5th, 2009

Look, I’m SUPER excited to see Watchmen when it hits theaters tomorrow. I’ve been absolutely giddy about it since I read the graphic novel last year. I’ve been following movie news sites for leaked images and updates for quite some time. I don’t think I’ve been this excited for a movie since the Lord of the Rings trilogy came out (and if you know me, you’ll know that that was 3 years of me totally geeking out). I just bought tickets for the 4:15 IMAX screening tomorrow (sorry, Stew!). So you’ll be hard pressed to find someone more excited about Watchmen than me.

That said, I’m starting to get weary of the marketing blitz. Seriously, folks, don’t you think this is a bit much?

Watchmen Overkill
click to enlarge

Seriously, RottenTomatoes, I think that people are well aware that this movie is coming out. Do you REALLY need to devote over 50% of your front page real estate to Watchmen? I think this is the definition of “obtrusive online marketing campaign”. Let’s take a closer look at this disaster:

Watchmen Overkill
click to enlarge

1. Header image link to “Watchmen Headquarters” (whatever that is). I think the costumed heroes in the grass is a nice touch. Cute.
2. A standard 728×90 banner ad for the Watchmen Motion Comic DVD. (I’ve seen one episode of this and it’s actually pretty cool)
3. Featured article on the Heroes of Watchmen. Okay whatever.
4. Small banner advertising the Watchmen Motion Comic DVD. TOTALLY UNECESSARY!
5. Noting that Watchmen is coming out tomorrow. And that it has gotten a disquieting 64% on the RottenMeter.
6. Thumbnail for the Watchmen Character Guide, as featured in #3… I think.
7. Photos from the Watchmen Premiere Gallery.
8. Another link to the Watchmen Premiere Gallery, this time featuring the two female leads and the words “red carpet”. For some reason, I get that they’re trying to appeal to the Grey’s Anatomy viewing demographic. Wait, Denny’s in this movie?!? OMG!!
9. An unnecessarily large rich media banner, again hawking the Watchmen Motion Graphic DVD. This one actually plays the trailer (whether you want it to or not) and expands to “take over” the page you originally navigated to (with the intention of finding information). Although I have created a few of these ads in my time. I’m not a big fan of them. They are deceitfully distracting and rudely obtrusive, and not to mention in this case, laughably redundant. Moving on…
10. Headline from RT News saying that Watchmen broke a record for the biggest opening (aka most theatres) of an R-rated movie.
11. Oh yeah, caught this one late – Watchmen is in the list of most anticipated upcoming movies. And understandably so. How could anyone miss it?

So there you have it, folks. The Watchmen overkill is official (at least at RottenTomatoes.com) and didn’t even scroll down the page. in 30 hours from now, I’ll be sitting in my seat with a bucket of popcorn and Finn at my side eagerly waiting for the lights to go down wondering “How the heck did these people hear about this movie anyways?”

Babies Are So Inconvenient!

Tuesday, February 24th, 2009

Marylynn and I just saw this commercial on TV and SCREAMED! You gotta see it. I can’t embed it. So just watch it and come back. It’s okay. I’ll wait.

“Kitchen”

We’re all for adoption, but seriously? This is the angle they’re going for? “Ugh, my kids are SO annoying. I think I’ll just get rid of the third one.” Ummm… okay, Adoptions From The Heart. Should children be really given up because they’re inconvenient? Look lady, do what I do. Answer the phone, yell at your kids for making a mess in the kitchen then watch SuperNanny for tips. Don’t you think giving up your baby is a little bit drastic of a move for an afternoon of crazy kids? And is there a father in the picture here? Does he have a say in the matter?

I’m sorry Adoptions From The Heart. Your cause is noble, but you FAIL. Fire your ad agency please.

Wal-Mart

Monday, July 14th, 2008

So tonight we went as a family to Wal-Mart (to return Buster’s new glasses, which is another story altogether) and I’m really glad we went. Why was I so glad?

Welcome to Hell

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